Goodbye, The Ralph

Sometime in the late 90’s, I attended my first ever Bills game. It was with my family, and I can’t quite remember if it was preseason or regular season, but it was against the Detroit Lions. I had to be about 10 or 11 at the time, and I remember that we were driving home in the dark. It was the only game that I ever attended with my grandpa. He and my uncle were huge Lions fans, and I remember us all going up to the game in a camper. I don’t remember the score. Don’t remember who won, even. But I remember who I was with. And that seems to be a recurring theme from my experiences at that stadium. Not outcomes. But rather, memories.

Sometime after that game, I attended my second, third, fourth games, etc. Those I have a bit of a clearer picture, as I was a bit older.

A game against the Dolphins that I attended with a friends’ family. I distinctly remember being seated directly next to a Dolphins fan that I trash talked the entire game. A game with another friends’ family that resulted in us being in a Tim Horton’s hospitality tent, pregame. That one was against the Seahawks, a home opener that Roscoe Parrish took one back on an insane punt return. There may have even been a fake field goal that game if I remember correctly.

Then, in my college years, my friends and I made a point to try to go to every home opener. TO’s first game in the stadium was seen from a suite that I did not own and did not belong in. I was passing beers out the window to people in the seats in front of me. An act that surely would’ve been frowned upon, if anybody knew about it. I remember a game from the 300’s against the Chargers where there was a power outage. Lee Evans caught a ball against his head for a touchdown right below us, and nobody outside of that stadium saw it. A game against the Raiders, front row in the endzone. David Nelson caught a game winning touchdown pass.

Then, rogue ones. Early fall games, late December games, preseason scorchers. I saw former Bills great Matt Leinart take the field in person. I sat in the Rockpile section of the stadium and saw Rian Lindell miss a real conservative field goal attempt to take the lead in a Monday Night game vs the Browns. I saw two separate games from the 300’s that I can’t even remember who they were against, but they stand out because I was with a friend that’s no longer with us.

I even attended a concert or two there. Guns n Roses, but more importantly to me, The Rolling Stones. It was 2015. The Stones announced they were coming back to Buffalo. I grew up listening to the Stones constantly. They were my dad’s favorite band. So, I bought tickets for me and him to go. I think I pitched it as a Father’s Day present and made up some story about how I got them discounted so he wouldn’t feel guilty about how much money I spent. I just wanted to go see a band that I grew up with, my dad’s favorite band, with him, regardless of cost. So, we went. We tailgated with his brother and my cousin as if it were any Bills game. We got beer spilled on our seats from the people behind us. But damn it, we saw the Rolling Stones together.

Then, late winter 2021, I was at my sister’s house. My sister, my brother-in-law, and I were having ourselves a night. At some point, we started reflecting on how great of a Bills season the Covid year was. How we wish we could’ve gone to a game. And, as all great decisions are formed, a drunken decision was made. We were going to buy season tickets. They would buy two. I would buy two. At the time, my goal was to bring friends along and have my second ticket already built in to hopefully someday bring my own family. The memories I’ve had in the last five years have been a direct result of the beers we drank that night. A lot of games stand out to me since then. But I’ll touch on the big ones.

The wind game. This one was a loss. It was brutal. A painful game to sit and watch. But the tailgate was great given the circumstances. We met a Pats fan from Boston that was attending his first game at our stadium. We traded beers with him as an act of respect. Then, on the way into the stadium, met a young man that was asking for help. We offered our assistance as the help that he needed was finishing his bottle of blackberry brandy so that he could go in. Sure. Covid be damned. We’re here to help.

The Perfect Game is by far the best game I ever attended. The energy in the parking lot in zero-degree weather was unmatched. My beers were freezing before I could drink them. People were going from fire to fire introducing themselves and making new friends. It felt like a survival party before the real party happened inside the stadium.

I took my now wife to her first game at the stadium. The home opener. A night game against the Titans where the Bills blew them out. We had only been dating a few months at that point, and it’s a great memory from early in our relationship. I remember the tailgate that day more than the game itself. We were in the front end of the mud lot. A place we always parked. But being that it was a night game and the opener? It was packed already by the time we got there. She couldn’t stop laughing watching all the fans and their parking lot antics.

Then, the game after the Damar Hamlin incident, I could kick myself for how that went. We were inside the stadium. The Legend of the Game did their intro. Something I refuse to miss. After the announcement was made that the Bills would have the ball first, I turned to my brother-in-law and said I was going to run to the bathroom before the offense took the field. He asked why I didn’t want to watch the kickoff and being that this was before the dynamic kickoff rules, my response was “they never return these. I’ll be fine.”

There I was, an idiot in the bathroom during kickoff. The crowd swelled and I thought “oh, they actually returned it and it’s a good one.” The crowd then swelled even louder, a second time. The bathroom began to shake, and it was the loudest I have ever heard the place, even from behind those concrete walls. I hung my head in shame and made my way back to our seats. My brother-in-law and sister were there to greet me and promptly make fun of me for missing it. I deserved it. I saw the second one though.

And finally, my favorite memory from the stadium came from this season. My wife and I had the opportunity to bring my stepdaughter to her first game. I fulfilled what I set out to do at the start of this. I went to a game with my own family. It turned out to not be just any game, either. It was the home opener vs the Ravens. The Bills were down big, and I had seen this movie so many times in my past. I turned to my wife and said “we should get going. The kids have school tomorrow, and we have to work. This game is over.”

She thought about it for a minute and said “this is her first game, let’s just stay until the end. We made it this far.” So, we did. We stayed until the very end of that game, and I could not be happier that she talked me into doing so. What a memory. What a first game to go to.

Heading into this week, I wasn’t sure what I would feel. I’m excited for the new stadium and new memories I’ll make there. And I knew I wanted to go to the final game at this stadium whether that meant this game against the Jets, or sometime in the playoffs. But I certainly didn’t think that I would feel this emotional about it. It’s just a pit in the ground with a bunch of concrete in it, after all. It’s completely out in the elements, and as a result, completely unforgiving. It couldn’t care less about the fans that attend the games or their level of comfort. But it holds some of the best memories of my life. I attended events with parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, grandparents, friends, and my own family. I’ve been to games with four different generations of my family. I’m not unique in saying that. Everybody from this area has their own version of these stories.

So, after tomorrow where we make one more memory together. This is goodbye. Highmark Stadium. Bills Stadium. New Era Field. Ralph Wilson Stadium. Rich Stadium. However you know it. Thanks for the memories.